Don and His Constant Bragging

He had been a long time friend, for may years, may he rest in peace. The one thing I knew for sure was that when the phone rang, I was sure it would be Don again. He had done something spectacular or was about to do something great. It got to be old after a while. Sure he didn’t have much, but he had to constantly reminded me about it.

“Hey, it wasn’t my fault you left your brains in your other pants. Or stood behind the door when the good lord was passing out brains and thought he said trains so you ordered a one track set. Don’t blame me!” Don would say.

On this one occasion, he had called me to tell me about his job and how early he had to get up in the morning so he could get started on the daily routine of driving the city garbage truck. He even had a helper now, this was a promotion for him since he had started out on the back of the truck.

I was complaining about the frost on the windshield of my pickup, so thick I had to use a metal ice scraper in the morning. This is the middle of December, its about 22 above in the daytime, a little chillier at night.


He promptly told me I should get up a little earlier and go out, start my pickup and let it defrost the window. I told him I couldn’t do that, because the cop across the street would give me trouble about leaving my car idling unattended. “I don’t have that trouble in my neighborhood he says, I have good neighbors.”

I reminded him that my people in my neighborhood were not of the same ethnicity as the one he lived in. “My neighbors are not from south of the boarder.” that didn’t faze him, he still called me lazy. So I thought maybe I should do something to give him something else to do besides brag. He told me I could always put newspaper on the windshield, I told him it would just freeze and be a bigger mess. “Ha ha, too bad you are such a lazy old bugger.”

Not… A… Real…Thing

I was going to a college close by to where he lived, and when class was over, it would be late in the evening. The perfect time to stop by and fix him up I thought. And that is just what I did. I put a small plastic water bottle in the pick up on my way to school that evening, and several pages of the morning paper I had.

I had the bottle wrapped up so it wouldn’t freeze, and couldn’t wait for class to end. I made a bee line for his house right after it ended. When I got there, I parked right across the street from his house, I could see he was watching TV. Now I get out and go over to his pickup and got inside, he never saw me.

I took the water bottle and sprayed the inside of his windshield and waited a few. It wasn’t very long and it had turned to ice! I repeated it again and this time I placed paper on the wet ice before it froze again. I did this process for about 3 layers of newspaper, I put it on thick.


That afternoon, I got a phone call from Don. He said he knew it was me, said it was something that I would do. Seems that he got off to a late start, and hurried out to the pickup, didn’t see the paper because it was dark and real cold. He thought it was just heavy frost on the windshield. Turned on the heater and went back inside.

When he came out, the window was not thawed out! He couldn’t understand why. Then he found the newspaper, that made a big mess for him because now he was in a hurry. Little pieces of paper got into the vents and were blowing all over as he was driving down the road. Even when he came home later that day. That did the trick, he didn’t call and brag quite as much anymore.


Those were the good old days, we did a lot of antics together while we were in the National Guard, it was always good clean fun and our reputation did spread. There might be a story posted soon, please come back by to find out on “what happened on Pops perspective.”

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